In case you didn’t know, I tasted the most amazing food in the world a couple weeks ago. An avid foodie– and, more importantly, an avid peanut butter lover– I was so intrigued when I first noticed Salted Caramel Peanut Butter (sugar free, whole foods, […]
Raise your hand if you were a picky eater as a kid.
(I’m raising my hand).
I was the PICKIEST of the picky. I could count the number of foods I was happy eating on both hands (well, both hands if you’ll allow me to put “Halloween candy” on one finger). I hated meats besides plan hamburgers and chicken thigh. Sandwiches were a no-go. Sweets were ALWAYS a yes, and lunch was chicken noodle soup or a Nature Valley granola bar. Bananas and apples were disgusting.
It’s funny because bananas and apples are my favourite fruits now, I’m not a fan of chicken noodle or granola bars, and I love practically every meat. I’m always so intrigued by other childhoods and ways of eating, too!
Any way, today, as I hungrily wondered to make for lunch, I thought back to childhood me, and wondered if 8-year-old Cassie might have any good ideas.
So I came up with this omelette, inspired by her, but refined for an adult (“refined,” aka vegetables).
It was REALLY YUMMY. Reminded me of childhood.
Feel free to change up the vegetables, or throw in some cheese!
I forgot how much I like ketchup and eggs– this was a real treat.
Yup. I’m a 21 year old Canadian female and only just recently got my ears pierced.
And then… un-pierced. And the whole debacle is what led to some leaps in my physical recovery from eating disorders, and a greater understanding of my personal identity.
Excessive? Allow me to explain.
I grew up with two sisters, and remember each of them getting their ears pierced. In fact, I remember each of them begging my mom to allow them to get their ears pierced at quite young ages.
But when my mom asked me if I ever wanted to get mine pierced, my answer, a few times over, was no. I just didn’t see the point in getting a needle put in my ears so that I could put jewelry in them. It just seemed like unnecessary efforts.
I’ve never been extremely opposed to the idea of having ear piercings, and definitely not to that of having piercings in general– I do, after all, have my belly button pierced. So when my friend Brooke and I went to get pedicures a few weeks ago and I noticed that the place did ear piercings for just $15 with free earrings, I thought, Why not?
Now, in hindsight, and after talking to a few friends afterward, I realize the question I really should have been asking when I saw that the piercing AND earrings together cost 15$ was Why?
In any case, I really liked the piercings for about a week after having them. They were easy to get used to, and easy to clean. I cleaned them thoroughly with warm salt water three times per day.
After about a week, though, I noticed the infection starting, and it only worsened over the next several days.
My dear friend, also known as my “soulmate” Bethany zeroed in on the infection the moment she saw me, and insisted upon taking me to Shoppers Drug Mart to get the appropriate products to fix it. I was incredibly grateful; I had not known what to do, especially with my go-to ailment-healer away at the cottage (my mom, of course).
And so, I set out to use the solution three times per day as Bethany had instructed, but soon realized that the infection was already too advanced. It would definitely require more serious care.
I decided to go to a walk-in clinic, where I was prescribed both a topical cream, and an antibiotic, by a patient doctor with a kind smile. The antibiotic was to be taken 4 times per day, with a decent meal each time.
It was when I realized how difficult it was for me to eat four large meals per day that I turned to prayer, confused.
I’m a “six small meals a day” kind of person, and this antibiotic did NOT work with snacks. If I didn’t have enough food with it, I noticed instantly that I had a horrible stomachache afterwards.
The last full update I did about eating disorder recovery is here.
After writing this one, I told myself that I would not qualify myself to give advice on my own experiences with recovery until I had gotten at least three periods in a row. I’ve experienced in the past “feeling” so educated on the topic of the recovery– and, from a knowledge-perspective, I am– but without having the success displayed in my own life.
So when I realized that the prospect of eating enough food at a time to make four large meals per day was mentally a little bit daunting, my reaction that of was fear and doubt.
Had I slipped back into more old habits than I’d realized?
I’ve spent a lot of this past week and a half reflecting on and praying about the previous year that I spent working at a health-food cafe.
I’ve already spoken about it to myself, and to some friends and family, and I don’t like to say it but acknowledging it was step one: some circumstances of the past year have triggered some old thought patterns which *sometimes* lead to old disordered behaviours.
That, and the reality that I could still relate so much to this video made me realize that “diet culture” had probably had its way with me more than I had previously admitted.
And, of course, my God and His timing? Sooo paramount.
The LORD your God will drive out those nations before you, little by little. You will not be allowed to eliminate them all at once, or the wild animals will multiply around you. DEUTERONOMY 7:22
I’ve had to take this antibiotic and learn to be okay with eating four big meals a day (and snacks, too, if I want them) during my couple weeks off after leaving my job in the health food industry, and before starting my new one as a writer.
There has been an INCREDIBLE amount of healing during this time that I didn’t even know I needed. I plan to share more about the key areas of healing that God has revealed to me through prayer, time in the Word, and those around me. Removing myself from lies that I’ve believed in the past that were my everyday environment for a while again, repenting of believing them, and getting up close with Truth and Life in Jesus has been the desire of my soul. And He’s already reminded me that He already had victory over this battle, and that if there’s more that needs to be nailed to the cross, would He show me, but otherwise I can walk confidently in that victory.
Today, I simply want to highlight that something as seemingly insignificant as an ear infection can be a paramount turning point when entrusted to God.
He uses everything for His glory. Even a silly decision to take a nail artist up on a $15 piercing.
I remember that, in high school, a “normal” conversation at the lunch table, at a party, or at a friend’s locker was about someone else. The “subject line” was rarely to do with the state of one’s soul, the deeper thoughts they’d been having, or […]
“Paradise.” That’s what my sister’s friend called my family cottage after just a few hours of exploring the grounds. “I’ve never been to a cottage like this.”
Krystal, Johnny, and I exchanged satisfied glances; Aly was not wrong. Papineau Lake was not like most lakes, and our humble cottage was certainly not like most cottages.
A literal log cabin built by my great grandparents, the cottage is more than just a family heirloom. It is the “favourite place in the world” of my immediate family, aunts and uncles, cousins, and, now, some of the friends we’ve brought to share it with.
For me, it simply takes a quick whiff of cottagey air to be transported to memories past. To be enveloped in a sea of memories of sand-muffin- baking, mermaid-swimming, and marshmallow-roasting. I have spent some part of each and every summer of my 21 years of life at Oma and Opa’s cottage, and, each time I step foot inside, I am overwhelmed by the reality that another year had passed by.
We have often called the cottage a “time machine” in this way. When you’re there, you can’t help but reminisce. For Oma and Opa, this means 60 years ago, before having kids of their own, to 40 years ago, when my mom was growing up, to 10 years ago, when my sisters and I joined them.
For Mom, it’s every summer of her own life; from childhood, to bringing my father for the first time, to bringing daughters one, two, and three. Something in the cabin or on the beach or in the boathouse will spark a memory, leading to a “Remember when” story that brings smiles to everyone’s faces.
Even Johnny, who just finished his third summertime at the cottage, now has memories, shares in the reminiscing, and remarks, “It feels like we were just here. It’s hard to believe another year has gone by.”
This past weekend was one to remember. Our one summer engaged, and Johnny and I navigating the change of graduating and entering “the real world,” this was a weekend of much-welcomed rejuvenation and recovery. It was an indescribable blessing to spend time with my family, and ultra-hot weather made it easy to jump right into Papineau’s clear blue.
I blog about the cottage because I want to remind you of some things that God through Papineau whispered to me this weekend:
Chase His presence.
Just like getting out in nature and away from screens after weeks of work and stuffy air and endless tasks is incredibly rejuvenating pretty much instantly, sitting at the feet of Jesus– who is omnipresent– is instantly healing. Don’t put off time with Him. There is no part of your day and no season of your life that doesn’t require the wisdom of Your Maker, and intimacy with Him.
Prioritize loved ones.
Being in community with my family and friends in a setting where I couldn’t think or do anything about my thoughts about work or the wedding or other things that demand my attention reminded me how important it is that, whenever I am spending time with loved ones, I am giving them undivided attention.
Love life– but not too much.
Recently, I have been struggling for the first notable time with coveting my life to the point of not wanting it to end. There’s so much I want to do in this world, and time is so short, I’ve thought. I wish I could have more of it.
Bringing these thoughts to Jesus, He has quieted my guilt for feeling them, and strengthened my purpose in HIM– the joy I have in living is from above, but my life is His alone. My body is not my own; my money is for His glory; and my very life is purposed to bring Him glory. “Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” JOHN 12:25
You don’t need a beautiful Northern-Ontario getaway in order to refresh your soul. Take ownership of it and live in His Grace and Truth today.
When I got engaged, I pictured myself blogging about all the pretty details, aesthetically sharing the history of our venue, swatches of bridesmaid dresses, and details about the menu (which is, I must say, to die for). I thought maybe I would naturally become one […]