MOTIVATION MONDAY:

Happy Monday my lovely ones!

How is everyone? My prayer is that all reading this encounter Jesus today in simple ways that are truly extraordinary. He is 24/7 with you, embracing you, loving you, and yet may you encounter Him in a new way that affirms His Truth.

I wanna talk today about what paleo eating is, and what orthorexia is, and what these things have looked like in my life recently.

Paleo eating, to begin, is the eating of whole foods, one-ingredient foods, if you will. This is mainly how I eat. Think foods like fresh fruits and veggies, nuts, seeds, raw oats and other unrefined grains. Things like crackers, granola bars, cereals, sauces, aren’t whole foods, but have tons of added sugars that our bodies weren’t meant to consume.

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Orthorexia,  by dictionary definition, is an “obsession with eating only foods that one considers healthy. A medical condition in which the sufferer systematically avoids specific foods in the belief that they are harmful.”

I was diagnosed with this illness, it being my fourth eating disorder diagnosis, at the clinic midway through my recovery from anorexia. The eating disorder had manifested itself, upon realizing that I was benign forced to eat SOME sort of food, to obsessing over WHICH foods. My particular Ed favoured foods that were balanced in carb/fat/protein content. So far as that, when my mom had o feed me a night snack , I would beg and plead for it to be kidney beans. Who enjoys plain kidney means for an evening snack?

MATTHEW 25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?

All of the thoughts about food that CONSUME me, that TAKE AWAY from my focus on Christ, that attempt to drive out HIS work in me, are of the enemy. Whether that’s binging (yeears ago), purging  (a few years ago), not eating (2 years ago), or only eating “safe” foods (still somewhat present in the enemy’s attempts), it is not right.

God has victory over all of my disordered thinking, and by His grace alone I can tap into that love. In that He has put on my heart that my passion for healthy food and clean eating, from God’s garden, is one that CAN be used for His glory and not that I am a slave to. I am excited and expectant of His work in continuing to fulfill what that means in my life, clean eating being my way solely because God has provided the bare bones of food we need, and for NOURISHMENT (praise Him for this blessing), not OBSESSION. A simple necessity for living on the earth that He has put us on for manifestation of His kingdom.

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Are you obsessions enemy-driven and keeping you from your OBSESSION for Jesus Christ? Pray about these and I’ve them to Him, for He has won the battle for you and is always worthy to be praised.

God Bless now and always! xoxo

 

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MY THOUGHTS THURSDAY: Equal in Sin

There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that we just can’t talk about the rest of us.

I came across this quote today in one of my Christian Studies books and really really liked it. The thing is that we as humans can’t judge anyone around us for any sort of sin. That doesn’t mean our son is “ok.” What it means is that our prayer must be for our free will to be put on stop so that Jesus might come into us and fulfill His will we must submit ourselves and our lives to Him, knowing that we are nothing without Him– that, in fact, being without Him is impossible. Once we accept His love into our hearts, we begin to see other human beings as creations in His image– we all are. It is the sin of this world and from the enemy that can turn our hearts cold or from Him. Submission to Christ results in His Spirit and say being fulfilled, acknowledged as Truth, and carried out. In all of this, overwhelming and otherwise impossible-to-find Joy is all that we can feel and see. We begin to know nothing else. We crave and every inch of our beings beg for more of God. And we know we’ll never fully know Him, but that knowledge only drives our obsession. When God gets a grip on the Spirit that has always been inside you, it’s all you can do not to shout His good news to the whole world.

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Invite God into your life today. Ask Him to take the wheel. He’s already driving, but is the enemy trying to take the wheel in your life? God hears your prayers, and He provides. He is so, so good. So give Him the wheel, and know that His will is all that must be done in your life.

WHAT I ATE WEDNESDAY: What Is Food?

Hey All! How are ya?

Today has been a really cool day as far as my recovery goes. This morning I woke up, spent a while in the Word and found myself mostly in the book of Romans, praying and giving my day over to the Lord. I ate breakfast and did some readings for school, and found enough time to watch an episode of Glee.
Breakfast, since I knew I’d have trouble eating throughout the day with my schedule, was big. I had a cup of oatmeal with peanut butter, banana slices, dates, blueberries, and an apple. I knew it was a big meal, and the enemy put a lot of emphasis on that, but in my prayer I submit my thoughts to Jesus and that His will might be my way. Today, that looked like me getting all ready for school in the morning, walking to the bus, and answering the phone when my little sister called and said she was sick. I told her she was welcome to come to uni with me, and after a lot of debate and me really feeling called to bring her, she decided to come. We had an awesome chance to catch up and laugh and talk about our lives on the bus ride to the school. Courtney is so funny, fun-loving, and genuine. She makes the world brighter and does everything with a smile. When we got to the school and in Laurier’s concourse, she said, “Is this a SCHOOL?” She’s just great and so authentic.
She sat in on my linguistics class with me, and then we went to Starbucks and met Laura who is, like Courtney, a passionate vegetarian. We all studied over tea and good conversation. A little while later, we met up with my boyfriend (hey dude, can I use that word now?) who Courtney is growing more and more fond of– I better watch out ;). It is incredible how much Johnny and I are growing with each other as well as each other’s friends and family, all of that growth in Christ, our prayer. At Johnny’s, we listened to a bunch of music and half-heartedly (well, Johnny whole-heartedly) watched an important soccer game to Johnny’s team. Just being with these two incredibly important people in my life and watching them light each other up and make each other laugh– ah, there’s nothing like that. We had so much fun.
After a couple hours, Courtney headed off to dance class, and I back to school where I met Maddie and Mary to talk about house showings for where we’ll be living next year. The seminary serves free soup, so I had a little bowl of vegetable soup and an apple for dinner. My hunger cues have been really off lately, and that little bit made me feel so full. Ed attacked immediately, saying that I’d eaten too much, but I knew that I hadn’t eaten enough for the day and made a mental note to have a real dinner and some snacks when I got home, kicking out Ed’s relent.
Christian Studies was wonderful tonight. We studied Jesus’ sermon on the mount and talked about what discipleship means in the way of submitting ourselves to Jesus and His will. His name was certainly lifted high and I praise Him for that work in my prof and in those who spoke His truths tonight!
At home, I had a chicken breast, some carrots, berries, and a banana with lots of peanut butter and dates. I am filled up and know this doesn’t give you guys a good basis for my intake, and although by Gods grace I haven’t counted calories for a few weeks, it was definitely above 2500 for today. Praise and thanks be to God for the healthy food I am able to eat and my lessening focus on it.

God Bless you all!

TOP TEN TUESDAY: Books

Hey y’all! Today I’m comprising by top ten favourite books/book series.

Harry Potter. This will never change. Like it’s not that I’m stubborn it’s just that there is no better series than Harry Potter. The metaphors and just overall story are brilliant. Every theme ties in and completes the whole series and I just love it.

Winter Girls. Laurie Halse Anderson writes the chilling and all too familiar story of a teen living with anorexia and depression in a world that is making less and less sense to her.

Hunger Games. One of two dystopic successes that I think is incredible, prophetic, and beautifully written.

Delirium. This is the other dystopic series that I do really like, about a world in which love is thought of as a disease. It points out the lustful aspects of “worldly love,” which isn’t true love.

The Kite Runner. An obvious classic, but incredible nonetheless. Khalid Hosseini is a whizz with motif.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. Ah, soo brilliant. The movie based on it was pretty good, too. One of the best series I’ve read recently.

The Forgotten Garden. Kate Morton writes these long books that are so easy to get lost in. This one has stuck with me since I read it like 5 years ago.

A Walk to Remember. Nicholas Sparkes’ novel about true love at a young age bonded by God gets me every time, and I love the movie too!

Lets Get Lost. I read this not-famous, almost sketchy looking book when I was 13 and loved it, and I can barely tell you what it’s about anymore but I remember it striking a major chord with me.

The Fault in Our Stars. This classic book is so well written in John Green’s beautiful style and voice. It is surprising, funny, heartfelt, and thematic.

MOTIVATION MONDAY: On Motivating Others

Happy Monday all!

The Lord has given us an incredible gift in that through our bodies He works, and that gift is His Holy Spirit. Only by His grace and through His word are what comes from our mouths able to influence anyone. In this, my question– who are you motivating, and what is God using you for?

God through each of us has a will and a way. He has absolutely put on my heart the need to help others struggling with eating disorders, and to reckon to all that the only way to ever recover from any trauma or mental illness is to welcome and live in the Truth and fullness of the Holy One. So who are you motivating, God through you? Who is near you that may look to you as an example, and how is God calling you to share His good news and that HE is the only example?

This Truth is an incredible beginning for what the Spirit might have in you. Recognizing that His life and death are the reason for His Spirit and for our call is major, the greatest revelation. Once we did to the idea that we or this earth has any role in our recovery, we start to see God and we. Start. To. Recover. We are then ready to MOTIVATE others, because Jesus’ joy is infectious and will be seen in those who are with Him. Isn’t that just too exciting?!

Be excited about God using you and working through you to get to more of His people. Whether that be in an eating disorder, an addiction, a minor or a major issue, be expectant of Gods greatness in it. And YoU will not be motivating; others will be motivated by the Spirit, the only motivator.

MY THOUGHTS THURSDAY: Bold, Humble, Imperfect Christian Human

A House without a Home

 

Holy Spirit, it is my prayer,

That oftentimes, in my despair

You hold me, grip me, come inside,

For your Truth is all that cannot hide.

 

“Christianity” and “Global Citizenship—“ two meanings?

For Jesus is Truth, and I know that preceding

Are different religions, they’re scattering the earth,

While all I can worship is the Holy One’s birth.

 

I know beautiful people, all in my midst

That don’t worship THE Saviour, don’t reckon His kiss.

But they’re beautiful just the same, just as perfect and true,

And as John tells us to “love one another,” me and you.

 

But if I am a Christian, I must reckon one Truth,

All while Satan tries to distort it in his bruiting ruth.

AND, if I am a Christian, that Truth does entail me

To love those who trouble, who taunt, and who fail He.

 

Many a Christian preach just parts of the Gospel,

We all leave some out, I suppose, I dispel,

But to be both a Christian and a citizen of the world,

Is not hard; in fact, both ideas are swirled.

 

We must encounter the other, must love him and respect,

That she is of love and therefore God, and my soul she will detect

As the same, one in God, one in intent and heart,

Our prayer be, Holy Spirit, that from you we never part.

 

WHAT I ATE WEDNESDAY: Food is Just Food

And I’m truly, through Christ alone, finally living that out.

Today was not about food in the least.

Happy Wednesday and prayers that you had a solid day seeking Christ and living out His work in you.

I am really proud of how NOT disordered my eating has been today. There was certainly room for the enemy to work, but in prayer I wasn’t even remotely focused on food today but on my portion and strength Jesus Christ, and I want to showcase what that translates to as far as food.

Breakfast. Knowing that there wasn’t much in the way of food for me to take to campus for my long day, and that I’m always reluctant to spend money on food, I made sure to eat a good breakfast this morning. I woke up, spent time in the Word and in prayer, and then made my favourite baked oats with blueberries and peanuts, because we’re out of peanut butter! It was delicious. I ate it whilst doing some readings for my online class and writing some lesson plans for the dance classes I teach.

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Lunch? A Few Little Snacks? I left the house at 11:30, but not before eating a handful of baby carrots and a clementine. I had Linguistics from 1-2:30, and then met up with Laura for some really good talks, and I bought a banana on campus to eat. I met up with Johnny then and we had some really important conversations, and I don’t know if he’ll read this and I tell him anyway but that boy still gives me butterflies, the best kind, and I have this faith that he always will. With his permission I’d definitely like to share more about our relationship with you guys, because the sole beauty in it is Christ and I cannot imagine anything else. I’m excited for us to grow together in pursuit of Him. Afterward I met Maddie for a quick half hour ab and cardio workout at the gym, and then we headed back to her place to change. We had some really incredible conversations about the work Gods been doing in both of our lives, and the lives of those around us. We didn’t have much time before our 7pm Christianity class, but at her place I ate an apple and a handful of pistachios.

Dinner? Class was great, my prof Allen is really incredible. I’ve had a lot of things recently on my heart about my program and whether its multi faith principle is something I can stand for as far as getting my degree from there, but that topic could take a whole post for itself. It was great to see a lot of my wonderful friends from the seminary. I bussed home and realized when I got to the kitchen how hungry I was! I could have had a more “normal” dinner, but I ate what I truly wanted and didn’t think twice, which ended up being carrots, banana, and apple slices with TONS of peanut butter and dates. Food is a blessing and we eat it so our bodies can thrive to carry out God’s will. The more I live in His Truth, the less the enemy is able to manifest itself as an eating disorder in me at all.