5 Things I've Learned Since Being Engaged at 21
My hands are no longer in beautiful shape 24/7, my ring is starting to feel as if it’s been on my finger forever, and “wedding talk” is becoming a necessary segment of every catch-up and conversation.
And while all of this is so exciting, and I am most certainly enjoying every aspect of planning, and being surrounded more than ever by loved ones, a few things have surprised me.
In wedding season, it’s common to be asked about the wedding, but not about the relationship. I don’t expect or necessarily think it would be right for people to be asking all the questions about mine and Johnny’s relationship, our decisions, and our love for each other. There is nothing wrong with excitement and questions about the planning of the big day, but much more than this day, I am excited to BE MARRIED to Johnny. The wedding day is going to be so special, but because our marriage will be special. It is that future together that we feel called to that is being celebrated. I am not fearful of myself getting caught up in the talk of that single day, as I’ve been enjoying it and allowing myself to enjoy it, but I want to express to others that the purpose of the day is what we really care about.
I had prepared myself for the, “you’re so young” comments… but I haven’t gotten a single one.
In fact, everyone I’ve talked to has said things like, “it’s always been so obvious you and Johnny were meant to be together,” and “you’re both so mature” and “good for you guys!” We pray people see only Jesus Christ in our love for each other, and His story in and through us.
In terms of where our money is going toward the wedding day, I care most about my guests and loved ones having a good time and being cared for.
I want to make sure we have a fun and versatile DJ, delicious food, and accommodating facilities. I want every guest to feel mine and Johnny’s love and care for them in both the way Jesus is glorified in our relationship, and in the way we choose to host them.
The best thing to hear from loved ones in the planning process is “Tell me how I can help you. We’ll follow your lead and vision. You make all the decisions.”
The amount of decisions that need to be made are pretty overwhelming, but I have SO appreciated the reminders from people that are so willing to help with what I need help with, but constantly reminding us that every wedding decision is ours, and not trying to control what we want.
The “wedding day” WILL fly by, and that is not only okay, it’s exciting!
It means that will be married, and Johnny and I see marriage as we believe God intended it according to His Word, which involves different things from a dating relationship, and we are excited to enter into those things, truly doing life together. I am so excited for the special day of all my favourite and closest people coming together to celebrate Jesus, but it will be one day, a future afterward I can’t wait to host those people and continue to pour into them, sometimes alongside my husband!
Johnny and I have never been big “planny” people when it comes to our relationship. We both receive love and gifts when they are spontaneous and genuine and fun, and not talked about, calculated, or planned. So we haven’t “set aside designated times” for planning or anything like that. We’re just going with the flow, focusing on our relationship above planning the wedding, and learning how to love each other even still in this distance, knowing that it’s over forever soon!
January 11, 2020, I am very excited for you to get here… but I’m going to love each day leading up to you, pressing into Christ above all.