“And I believe I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.” PSALM 27
Yesterday, Wednesday, Jesus taught me so many new things.
Recently my time in the Word has led me to this desire for colour. I have been wanting to get some pencil crayons and a Bible with lots of space to move in colour with the Spirit. He has been internalizing Scripture within me, and while I’ve never been very visual, He’s teaching me art as a gift.
I had that on my heart during my morning study and just shared and received His preparation for the day as I prayed. I had a midterm early afternoon that I studied for.
Iambic pentameter, tetrameter, anaphora…
You’re full of LIFE, you’re full of PASSION, that’s how He made you– just let it happen.
Study study, pour coffee with thoughtless pool of almond milk, Madds and Mary in the kitchen, laughs, cranberry oats (so much, yummy, FILLING, lick the peanut butter off the knife), stumble out the door for midterm–
Take me back to the beginning, when I was young and running through the fields with You, Jesus.
Midterm, come on Memory kick in, still more lecture, poetry how I love but hate you.
I’m laying down all my religion, I wanna know You Lord.
Shopping with Maddie and Kennedy. We go uptown and browse. The Gospel Lighthouse has a journalling Bible and the man working is very kind. We pick out birthday gifts for special friends (and my mom!); browse endlessly; groceries and snacks; more class.
I am not forgetting Your presence in the midst of fog, Jesus. In any fog, I cling only to Your presence my God.
Lecture. Group Work. Clear conversations (about Harry Potter!), laughs.
Pit stop on the way to a tea date I’m very excited about for
p e n c i l c r a y o n s
TEA with my lovely Emily. Invigorated by her vulnerability, her seeker heart, Jesus calling her. I can hear Him calling out to her during our conversation. I can feel Him smiling, sitting with us.
Jesus, get lost with us as we race to You.
Emily and I both hold each other accountable to new things that we’re convicted of. I have to run, I tell her,
I’m making dinner from ma sooooul for a special friend.
I head home, I start my worship as I cook. It’s a rhythm HE puts me in. Who knows what I’ll cook or how much of the ingredients will be in it? Unless I’m following a cool new recipe, I’d way rather just cook, and try new things.
I find myself peeling carrots into swirls, sautéing minced onion with edamame, seasoning stir fry beef and boiling rice. Spices come together and I taste as I go and I’m crying because I feel like ME. I feel ready. I feel Jesus saying, Yes, Cassie, I’ve prepared you for this. Soak it in and understand that it’s Me, but know that there’s SO MUCH MORE I’m preparing you for.
Cass is here, a lovely new friend, and she sits while I cook and we talk. I hear about her week, I resonate with her in so many ways and we thank Jesus together as I divvy up stir fry goodness and dollop hummus on top saying, “Maybe it’ll be good all mixed up, who knows? We’ll try it,” and we eat our food and both Cassies like it. Both Cassies have ample cause to praise Jesus for it, and for the friendship, and for absolutely everything.
Cass is honestly like looking at my fourteen year old self. With a bit of a struggle in her, yes, but a WHOLE LOT of love for the Lord, of joy, and of laughter.
I am literally that fourteen year old self again too. I am true Cassie in Christ, of course praying in growth every day– but I recognize my freedom.
You make me soul alive, Jesus.
I get to head to tap, I am so excited, and we learn a whole new section and I always wish the class is twice as long.
Tap is over, but the night isn’t. I come home to Mary and Maddie snuggled on the couch watching Into the Woods, one of my favourite movies. I make snacks and tea, join the girls, we’re laughing and Mary’s birthday is at midnight and we cheer when it strikes, and end up staying awake till 2 am because the Lord has so much to show us. We’re talking and praying and He keeps me clung to Him in the wee hours of the night, showing me more and more what His preparation looks like– and it has nothing to do with eating or food.
Jesus, my Jesus, I will always sing Your praise.