faith, freedom, food

Tag: #foodie

Why Recovering Eating Disorder Patients DO Need to Eat A LOT…

Why Recovering Eating Disorder Patients DO Need to Eat A LOT…

It is a common misconception that people with eating disorders hate food. The reality is quite the contrary. In most eating disorder sufferers, food is obsessed over, constantly thought about, and researched.In the depths of my disorder, I constantly baked and cooked high-fat, delicious dishes that I wouldn’t let my own tongue even nearly close to, but that I served with glee to those around me.

Hypothalamic Amenorrhea Recovery… While Wedding Planning: An Update

Hypothalamic Amenorrhea Recovery… While Wedding Planning: An Update

Frustrated is my word of choice. I am overwhelmingly frustrated. I’ve read every blog post about hypothalamic amenorrhea. I’ve spent months eating as much as my insides could take without exploding and remaining sedentary. Then I’ve tried adding in light exercise, eating high high fat […]

Share Your Deepest Failures, Be Met with… Compassion?

Share Your Deepest Failures, Be Met with… Compassion?

He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion.

Happy Monday!

Does anyone else write stories in their minds?

The place most conducive to “Story-Writing” in my thought-life is the cafe I work at, Smile Tiger.


I’ve never worked somewhere in my life in which the people are so compassionate and family-oriented, and the atmosphere is so cozy. The most loyal and true “Regular Customers” are here every day, and the quaint furniture is entirely irreplaceable.

This is why, as a writing-coffee-lover who has been doing both for many years, it is bittersweet for me to announce that I am leaving the coffee industry behind, as I have accepted a full time position as a writer at a multimedia marketing/design agency.

I will miss serving people. I will miss directly engaging with strangers. I will miss tidying the cafe and answering questions and toasting the yummiest, fluffiest bread and heating scones. This is the shortest job I have ever had, but it has certainly left its mark.

A conversation I had today with one of my co-workers here actually reminded me of what I am excited to share with you guys today. It is something from Scripture that has been on my heart for some time now.

He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion. PROVERBS 28:13

This is a topic I’ve been wrestling with the Holy Spirit with for several days now. It goes like this:

We often hide our sins, our shortcomings, our failures. Our wrongdoings. But I actually think this hiding is one of the worst things we could possibly do, and the reason why is revealed by this Proverb writer.
When we confess and repent of our sins, we will find… COMPASSION.

What? My God, my God… you have compassion for (*insert most horrible “secret sin” I have committed?)

My God’s answer is YES. Forgiveness is His Song, and Grace for His people is all that Jesus is. But He asks us to confess them. Reveal them.

The thing I have been wrestling with is the tendency of people in what we share/confess when we ask for prayer.

In “prayer requests,” we often ask for help with the things that are “easy” to admit. Healing for someone with cancer; help with an exam. It is by no means WRONG to ask for prayer for these things, but how often do we confess things like porn addiction, lusts, and greed, and ask for prayer and accountability? How often do we call out the nitty gritty details of our most “secret sins,” renounce them, and give them to God?

I believe that the devil works to keep us in fear of sharing our sins. In fear of judgement, rejection, or change. But something I have discovered is that, the moment we bring to light the thing that we were so afraid to share, comes joy and healing we never thought possible. Then comes some of the sweetest moments in life– because, after all, Christ’s strength is “made perfect in our weakness.”

I was reminded of this at work today because of that beautiful co-worker I mentioned, who welcomed conversation by asking me questions about some of the real “tough stuff,” without shying away from any of the details. This kind of vulnerability should be normalized. This kind of revelation of failures, met with nothing but love, should be welcomed.

Is there something you are struggling with that you are afraid to share with someone – or just with God – that you are maybe feeling like you need to? What is this discussion stirring up in you?

There is such beauty in authenticity. We can know God’s Truth all we want, and we can believe it – but that doesn’t mean our earthly experience is 24/7 joy. But KNOWING that there is a Living God who wants to make us more and more like His perfect Son daily… that is tons of motivation to repent of our sins.

“You Look Healthy”

You look healthy. It tops the list of things NOT to say to a recovering/recovered/suffering person with an eating disorder. While, to most, this is a compliment; a good thing; the mental illness that is an eating disorder is a pro at twisting positive things […]

Having My Bridal Shower Cake… and Eating It, Too

Having My Bridal Shower Cake… and Eating It, Too

Here’s what they don’t tell you about eating disorders: They’re usually pretty innocent at first. An endeavour to “be healthier.” When my restrictive illness first developed when I was fifteen, I never would have considered that I might still be terrified of white flour and […]

Me At 10 Years vs. Me in 10 Years

Me At 10 Years vs. Me in 10 Years

A couple weeks ago, I came across an exercise online that someone had shared had really shifted their thinking.

The person relented that they wanted to know what their 10-year-old self, AND their self IN 10 years, would think of the way their present self was living.

For me, that means: what would 10-year-old Cassie think of 21-year-old Cassie?

What do I WANT 31-year-old Cassie to think of and remember about 21-year-old Cassie?

Thinking about these things has absolutely been mind-shifting, and I would encourage you to do the same.

First: 10-year-old Cassie.

I’m to the right here. This is definitely more like 7-or-8-year-old Cassie, but, in any case…

She loved Harry Potter and all things fiction, drama, and faith-related. She had grown a deepening interest in and relationship with God, and had transitioned from dreaming of being a child actress to feeling a calling to church ministry.

She had not yet developed any negative or disordered relationship with food, knowing nothing about it but that she enjoyed it. She didn’t think about or plan food between meals, but ate what was in front of her, though was quite picky.

She didn’t have any care in the world for social media platforms, her physical image, or the way others perceived her. In fact, I specifically remember 8-year-old Cassie standing on her chair during lunch, proclaiming to her class that she has a crush on a boy named Jin because “looks don’t matter.”

31-year-old Cassie. What do I hope she is like?

I hope that she is as far away from disordered eating as one could be.

I pray that she has more love in her heart, and spends less time in front of screens.

I hope that she is consumed with love for her husband, and their children. I hope that she feels confident in her job, and that she prioritizes actively helping others.

I hope that prayer is deeply intertwined with how she lives her life. I hope that she is more well-versed in theology, the Bible, and has read The Lord of the Rings.

I hope that she is a better chef, and has established fun and quirky traditions with her family.

I hope that she is in touch with, and frequently sees, all her beautiful, unmatchable friends; her incredible parents; her sisters, in-laws, and extended family.

I hope that she didn’t waste time taking things too seriously, or worrying that she was “behind” in life. I hope she didn’t waste time worrying about spending money on a dinner or two out with friends.

….

Alllllll right, 21-year-old Cass. Where are we at?

Naturally….. the things I mentioned 10-year-old Cassie lacking– and the things I HOPE 31-year-old Cassie lacks– are some of the things I am convicted that 21-year-old Cassie deals with.

So, instead of consuming myself with worries about money and my job, I’m going to think more about my loved ones and my community.

Instead of spending free time on my phone, I want to stop the scroll for a moment of conversation with my God.

Instead of allowing old disordered habits to sneak into my mind, I want to relinquish every thought to Jesus, and build deep roots in His Word, and in His Truth about those thoughts.

Okay, Friend. It’s your turn.

What does 10-year-old you think of you now?

What do you hope you IN 10 years looks back on about you now?

Blackberry Crumble

Blackberry Crumble

In case you didn’t know, I tasted the most amazing food in the world a couple weeks ago. An avid foodie– and, more importantly, an avid peanut butter lover– I was so intrigued when I first noticed Salted Caramel Peanut Butter (sugar free, whole foods, […]

3 Engaged Girls, One House

3 Engaged Girls, One House

It is only just hitting me that in a matter of weeks, the girls I have lived with for the past three years and I will never live together again. In fact, each of us will be transitioning to living with– a man— for the […]

Childhood Chicken Fried Rice

Childhood Chicken Fried Rice

Raise your hand if you were a picky eater as a kid.

(I’m raising my hand).

I was the PICKIEST of the picky. I could count the number of foods I was happy eating on both hands (well, both hands if you’ll allow me to put “Halloween candy” on one finger). I hated meats besides plan hamburgers and chicken thigh. Sandwiches were a no-go. Sweets were ALWAYS a yes, and lunch was chicken noodle soup or a Nature Valley granola bar. Bananas and apples were disgusting.

It’s funny because bananas and apples are my favourite fruits now, I’m not a fan of chicken noodle or granola bars, and I love practically every meat. I’m always so intrigued by other childhoods and ways of eating, too!

Any way, today, as I hungrily wondered to make for lunch, I thought back to childhood me, and wondered if 8-year-old Cassie might have any good ideas.

So I came up with this omelette, inspired by her, but refined for an adult (“refined,” aka vegetables).

It was REALLY YUMMY. Reminded me of childhood.

Feel free to change up the vegetables, or throw in some cheese!

I forgot how much I like ketchup and eggs– this was a real treat.

Curated KW: Interviewing the Girls Behind the Gram

Curated KW: Interviewing the Girls Behind the Gram

When I first stumbled upon Curated KW, I was so intrigued. Quite honestly, I wanted to WORK for the business, be a part of it in some way. I assumed, given the obvious effort and passion displayed in this initiative to help Waterloo Regioners understand […]