I haven’t wanted to face it, let alone write about it.
The very topic has caused me to close my laptop and attempt to anything and everything but write. I haven’t wanted to acknowledge its presence, but it has hit me: writer’s block.
I would like to say, “It’s okay. You can take some time off writing. You did, after all, just finish a four-year degree for which you practically never STOPPED writing.” But the perfectionist in me cannot say that.
Writing is my joy, my calling, and my freedom. Of these things I am sure. I could spend forever spinning stories, rewording prose to make it more beautiful and flowery and audience-appropriate. And what I write usually comes very naturally to me.
But it is as if graduating university has put an abrupt halt to all of that, causing me to question the merit of writing when it isn’t for the sake of literary analysis or discovering truth in a work.
Amos replied, “I’m not a professional prophet, and I was never trained to be one. I’m just a shepherd, and I take care of sycamore-fig trees. But the Lord called me away from my flock and told me, ‘Go and prophesy to my people in Israel.’ AMOS 7:14-15
This verse in the Book of Amos reminds me that I am not a professional writer, nor will I ever be. God has not asked me to be perfect, but to serve HIM in the way I write as I have been called. I want this blog to be FULL of His provisions; to be marvellous to His ears, and to be nothing but a glorification of His great name.
So, what HAS been inspired in the midst of this “writer’s block” (still perhaps refusing to call it that) is a devotional for the confused and undecided.
Lord, I don’t know what the future of my life holds. But You do, Jesus. Even now, quiet the voice that tries to tell me You don’t. I know and believe that You do. You have gone before me, Lord, and I pray that my steps are in alignment with what You have purposed me for, for the glory of Your Holy Name.
Jesus, when I feel scared of the unknown, remind me that I am fully known and fully loved by the only Eternal King of the universe. Jesus, when I feel like a failure for not knowing what is next, remind me that You have already overcome, defeated the grave, and therefore call me chosen and set apart; not a failure, but called to be a servant.
God, in my stirring, be my everything. In my weakness, remind me who the Healer is. When I forget Your perfection, put on my heart all that You have already done.
I have a feeling Cassie, Compiled. will be hearing a lot more from me in the coming months!
- What topic would you love for me to cover?