Happy Wednesday guys! Prayers and thoughts with you that your weeks are fulfilling to Christ’s works and forever striving in and by His grace.
Today I let the food talk for God’s good works in me.
Breakfast this morning was big and therefore challenging. I made a big bowl of oatmeal with a bunch of berries, coconut oil, and sunflower seeds. I got in a good amount of (unmeasured!!!) substance that I knew I’d need for the day. I spent the morning in the book of Hebrews, doing some homework, and cleaning my room a bit. I’m home by myself Wednesday mornings so I definitely sing at the top of my lungs and worked on choreography for the classes I teach too. I bussed to class in time for Linguistics, and then met Laura to study together where we caught up and I ate a Lara bar as a snack. A few hours later, Johnny and I headed to house for some always needed, never long enough time together. Together we’re reading a book called “When God Writes Your Love Story.” We’re not very far, but the premise and the writing is fantastic and I would recommend it to all couples, above all tapping into God and what He would have for your relationship.
And this boy makes me smile more than I thought was possible. And the peace, spirituality, humour, and cuteness in our relationship is all to be given to God. Praising Him in all of this. I later had a handful of carrots while watching Netflix with Johnny, his brother, and housemate, noting the normalcy of Johnny’s dinner that is/was “just food.” FUEL. Necessary.
I had Christian Studies in the evening, our class still centered in Matthew Chapter 5. God generated discussion on our being “the light of the world” and not “the lights of the world” because WE, as humans, are not the lights– there is no plural. Rather GOD and ONLY GOD is the LIGHT, and He works through us to shine to this sinful earth. Nothing to do with US, only to do with HIM. Ah, so good. What better encouragement from my Saviour to live for Him, therefore fueling the body He blessed me without distraction or the work of the enemy.
After class, I missed my bus home, and only then did I realize my extreme hunger. I wandered back to the seminary and grabbed an apple from the kitchen.
By the time I got home, it was after 11, and I knew I hadn’t eaten nearly enough for the day. I put on a big sweater, got comfy, positioned myself with some homework and glee, and ate dinner, exactly what I was wanting: banana, dates, tons of berries, and carrots with peanut butter. I know this doesn’t sound like dinner, but it was TRULY what sounded good to me and I ate plenty. Not giving into Ed thoughts whatsoever but more so challenging them, also with no calories counted, no measuring, and little anxiety. Forever praising the Lord.
Im off to bed now, sleep tight and blessings for a prayerful and peaceful night.

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    1. Honoured to have you on the blog Anna! Hm. I get that question often and never know how to answer it. I’ve told most people that I don’t think there is a such thing as “recovered,” and the more I see my recovery journey as simply my journey to knowing Christ more fully, the more that is affirmed because we as sinning humans will NEVER know Christ fully, at least on this earth. At the same time, I am free and Christ has victory over my disorder; but me, Cassie, I don’t, only through Him I do.
      With that, I still have a lot of struggles, with measuring food, “good/bad” foods, counting calories. But the closer I grow to God, the more those things will disappear.
      Are you starting a blog? Have an awesome day girl!

      1. Well just as a thought, did jesus FULLY heal? When he healed someone I never once read a story that they would limp away. I believe in full recovery. If you believe then it is possible. If you don’t it isn’t. Faith can move mountains. Faith can get rid of eating disorders if we first believe in freedom. You said we will never know Christ while we’re on Earth. However, with the Holy Spirit living inside of us we know more answers than we like to acknowledge. He is the Spirit of ALL truth. I appreciate all your efforts, I just know there’s more Christ has for you. <3

        1. His Spirit has revealed so much to you and it is fantastic to talk with a sister in Christ who is also battling an eating disorder. I do completely agree! Yes, IN CHRIST absolutely anything is possible and in submission to Him, not for our own gain but for our ability to carry out His works. The Spirit is absolutely living in all of us and what a remarkable gift– a daily prayer that His Spirit is what my actions and words embody. I meant more than as humans none of us can ever “know” Christ fully, as in live the way He lived but may that drive is more so in our purpose to know Him only more. Amen, HE is the Spirit of ALL Truth.

          1. I do like your passion for him. I understand 89% of doctors & people probably don’t believe in a full recovery to be recoverED. I do, therefore I am. But as with any sin, the temptations to take ED back come, but just like in the bible it says to resist the devil and he will flee. after saying no to ED multiple times, the temptations are less frequent & then they become simply the occasional thought that is fleeting. it no longer is a part of you, of even your sinful nature. With all this, i guess i just want to say that i don’t think you’re eating enough and it just makes me sad because i can see how much you adore God & i know he’s offering more to you. do you belong to any particular religion?

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